“Orientation Speech”

The British had schools, the Americans will have schools. We’ll make them even better. Industry, science.
People come from around the world to go to American schools. Members of Wu-Tang perform at the local clubs, fraternity members run around naked, in thongs or with a cape around them. People listen to the Mountain Goats while drinking on a rooftop, rolling their own cigarettes with American Spirit loose.
There’s a football team in high school, there’s a football team in college. It is the exact point at which business meets education. A missed field goal is in a way the coach’s fault. He is up in arms, screaming at the referees for a call that indirectly led to the miss. The refs know he’s getting paid, he could get fired. For education, we pay. For sports, we pay. Your life, should you choose to accept it, will be the art of performing for the person who pays you.

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